Witches Haven

Oral Sex

Just a few musings, thoughts and mental meanderings. Was talking about oral sex with my partner, we both enjoy it.

There was a time when I refused to complete the act with him, actually swallow. I believed all the high school tattlings about it. It was disgusting, tasted terrible, would make you puke.

The usual teenage girl myths. It was a myth that stuck with me for years and years. Finally about 10 years ago? Perhaps longer, I figured enough was enough and I should give this a shot, any pun is purely unintentional.

I haven't looked back. I didn't disgrace myself and vomit, it doesn't taste terrible and it is definitely not disgusting.

Drinking corner store wine is disgusting, sharing something as intimate as this with a lover? Disgusting? Not in my world.

I really enjoy trying new techniques; my next trip involves these nifty little exploding candies the kids eat, Pop Rocks I think they are called. I'm sure they were never intended for this kind of use but neither are a number of other foods, whipped cream, strawberries, cucumbers.

A simple piece of wisdom for both men and women; cleanliness, above all, cleanliness.

I wish more men knew how truly disgusting penis/testicular odour can be mind you, my partner has a few tales of his own regarding my "sisterhood" and a lack of feminine hygiene.

I am like him in that regard, I try to always be immaculately clean.

Ladies and Gentlemen? The shaver is not just for the face, legs and pits anymore. Personally? I don't recommend waxing. The pulling of the skin must cause some nerve damage eventually. Proper shaving techniques are my preference. Shaving greatly increases the sensitivity of the area. If you want to avoid razor burn, use a shaving gel designed for sensitive skin. Follow that up with a little aloe vera gel. Keep the area shaved. Once the hair begins to grown back? That's when the itching starts.

Shaving also increases the cleanliness of the area. Far less opportunity for bacteria to take root, as it were. Odor is caused by bacteria. Some of the bacteria is good but if there is a strong odor? That's notsogood. Keep it clean.

Oral sex does not take a lot of skill. While enthusiasm is a definite "MUST HAVE," it does have to be augemented with a certain amount of finesse and yes, skill.

Far too many men believe a few neck nibbles, a breast massage, an oral tug or two on the nipples and it will be OFF to the races.

Wrong. Gentlemen? Breasts are not stress balls, let's try not to mold them into some kind of unnatural condition, a little finesse, please. Sucking noises from the nipple area? What is that and where, on earth, did you ever learn that this was sexy?

Let's give the breasts the attention, the care that they deserve. They are not instant access to female orgasm, regardless of what you've "seen" on the porn flicks. Porn flicks are great stimuli but, too bad, so sad, they do not, in any way, in any shape, in any form, represent the woman who is suffering through your heavy handed gropings and completely ineffectual nipple wresting.

Gentle to start and if your partner is enjoying it? Why move south in a rush? Enjoy her breasts and let her enjoy you enjoying them. Start off lightly, as if you are testing to see if something is hot. Play your cards right and in not time at all? You will be testing something hot.

If you aren't sure? ASK. As a matter of fact, take breaks, a little teasing interval to find out if you are doing it right.

The breast is more than just the damn nipple, it is an entire package. The sides, underneath, toward the top, work your way inward, toward the nipple. Don't start at the finish line, as it were. Same for the ladies, many men love chest play, nipple play, whatever you enjoy? Try on your male partner. If your partner is female? You're a few steps ahead. You already KNOW what is erotic and what is annoying.

Have a few additions handy, for example, at no cost to you? An ice cube. DON'T press it onto her nipple, far too heavy handed. Hold it in your mouth, allow it to change your temperature and then try it. Same concept with a hot beverage. If you want to try something different, there are all sorts of products that will affect the skin, specifically for an erotic reaction. Ask Vera, she can give you a hand with choosing the right product for you.

Moving on down. Be very careful with the midriff area. Soft and sensual is great but too soft and you may be in tickle territory. A sure-fire mood killer. Firm but soft. Takes practice but what a way to learn! Always, always take your time. It may require discipline on both your parts but again, what a great way to learn!

Yes, I know what follows on this particular road but you want to avoid hitting the target area just yet. There are so many other spots to visit.

Follow the outside of the waistline, to the hips, spend some time there. Massaging toward the target but not quite. Yes, very devilish but worth the time spent.

Hold on Cowboys and Cowgirls! You aren't there yet. The inner thigh is the golden way.

Kiss that area, it is super sensitive and will be more so if you have been following my little map to the treasure. Use your tongue, always working toward that area where X marks the spot but not quite. If you are paying attention to these lessons? You should be well aware of your coming success.

If you have a toy that vibrates? Make sure it is on hand. This is a great time to employ the little marvels. Not at full tilt. You aren't looking to create the Indy 500 sound effects in your intimate moments and unfortunately, most vibrating toys tend to be a little on the loud, distracting side. Keep it low. In more ways than one. Use the vibrating on the outside of the labia (the lips), work up to the mound, completely avoiding the "inner workings." The " Bullet" seems to be the best choice. I have the graphic linked to a description.

Keep it away from the tip of the clitoris. While women are more than capable of multiple orgasm, it is too early for that yet. You still have a way to go.

While enjoying your location, don't forget the flipside. Turn your partner over, and start at the top again. The back of the neck, maybe a gentle tug on a handful of hair. Enjoy her back. Wander down the spine with your fingers and mouth. If you aren't experienced with anal sex, it is best to avoid that particular area. Inhibitions run deep and can work faster than a cold shower. Just work your way down, between the legs, following the cheeks.

You are almost there. Go back to your original position and NOW, is the time to go on an oral expedition.

Put the porn flicks out of your mind. Your hand or tongue should not resemble a power drill. You aren't there to break speed records. Slow Hand, dear friends, use a slow hand. She'll let you know if she wants faster or harder. Don't assume. Communication requires listening as well as verbalizing. It can also mean, watching your partner's body language.

Use long slow strokes with your tongue to start, you may not have much time if this is your first real oral expedition. Be aware of the body language!

Understand that the clitoris is not only that little piece that pops out to greet you, the nerves leading to the tip of the clit run all the way down the labia, inside and out. All of these areas love to have attention spend on them. Use your tongue but your fingers as well, sensual massage. Not hamfisted groping. This is a delicate area, not meant to be poked and proded with no finesse.

One of the techniques my partner uses is an almost butterfly motion on the tip of the clitoris. It can make me lose my mind and not want it back.

The butterfly motion consists of soft but firm, quick little touches with the end of the tongue. As it implies, like butterfly wings.

It shouldn't be long now, you'll have your rewards. Your just dessert, so to speak. Either get ready to penetrate with your penis or if neither of you has one? Get the dildo ready. When the climax hits is when you should be penetrating. Working on your timing is a lot of fun and a great way to learn.

All of this mounts to a few important points:

• communicate
• watch your partner's body language
• communicate
• experiment but gently
• communicate
• have the time of your life.
• communicate