Witches Haven

BECOMING INVOLVED WITH A COVEN

1. First and foremost - examine why you want to join a coven in the
first place. A little harsh self-evaluation is required. Do you want
to "belong" to something different, something special or viewed by the mainstream as mysterious?

Then, perhaps, this isn't the time for you to be searching out a
coven. Are you looking for friends, parties and good times? Again.now
is not a good time.

Joining a coven or rather, being accepted by a coven
requires a great deal of commitment from you. Your time and your energy.

Missing a meeting or ritual because you promised to go out drinking with a friend isn't a valid excuse - missing said meetings or rituals because you have too much homework or you want to see your boyfriend/girlfriend isn't a valid excuse.

A coven isn't a social club. It is a body of people
celebrating their beliefs together. It is a highly spiritual thing.

These people are your extended family or should be. There is a strong
bond between coven members that should not be insulted by lame excuses.

2. With this in mind - it is important to remember that like any
family unit, there are dysfunctional ones out there. Beware of the coven with the domineering HP and HPS. Beware of the coven with power struggles and internal gossip. These covens will implode and create a great deal of bitterness in its wake.

3.Make darn sure that the beliefs of the coven and its practices are
complimentary to your own ethics/morals. If it doesn't feel right to
you - then it isn't. Walk away.

4. Sky clad ritual is not a pre-requisite for many covens. It is
actually pretty rare now. This is due to the ease of abuse in this type of situation.

Sky clad celebration can be extremely easily misunderstood by the
outside world and its just not worth the grief. Let's face it - if you live
in the more northern areas of Europe or North America, the opportunities for sky clad ritual, in a comfortable environment are pretty few and far between.

If your aren't conducting your own personal symphony with chattering teeth in C minor - then you are swatting mosquitoes and black flies who have turned you into their personal buffet.

Loose fitting robes - naked underneath is a more common method of
ritual attire. It allows everyone a measure of comfort and protection.

5. Great Rite, similarly, is rarely practiced anymore. Symbolism has
become the norm. Again, far too many opportunities for abuse. The Pagan community is aging and more than a few covens have their members' children involved.

The chances are too great for misunderstanding and so again - we have learned to adapt our beliefs to the society in which we live. To
celebrate Great Rite is to accept the consequences of charges of abuse, rape and/or contributing to the delinquency of a minor. I am fairly certain that my Deities don't mind. This doesn't dilute the significance, not if the intent is there.

6. If you have trouble with accepting the concepts, rules or
anything else done by the coven - please don't waste your time and theirs.

Move on.

This is the way this coven worked before being graced by your presence and this is how it will work after you are gone.

Leave on a positive note, not because you have been given the boot for being arrogant, troublesome or just generally obnoxious.

7. If something feels "creepy" to you. Don't hesitate breaking
circle. Just get your butt out of there - fast. Again, better a few noses out of joint than finding yourself in a compromising situation with no escape.

8. Be very suspicious and rightly so, of any coven that advocates
mood altering drugs or herbs. Drugs are called "recreational" for a
reason.

They are also, need I remind you, illegal.

Please do not buy into the ancient Incas and native lore someone may try to feed you.

This was a very, very long time ago. Incas also practiced human sacrifice..does that mean we should be returning to that as well? Not that I haven't thought of a view viable candidates as reasons to revive the practice…

Establishing a spiritual connection to the "Others" is difficult enough,
why cloud the issue with drugs?

You will never be sure if that connection between you and your Deities was real or simply a terrific buzz..

9. Let's assume that you have found a coven - you are a member.

Member being the key word.

Yes, you are also a student. You are not, however, the chief cook and bottle washer. You are not required to be an unpaid housekeeper or maid.

If you have arranged barter, for some reason, with the HP/HPS - then that is a totally different matter.

If you have agreed to any or all of the above, then that's your problem. Be aware of what is expected from you as a member of that particular coven. If it is not in your comfort zone - then leave.

10. Being a member of a coven in a big responsibility. You may have
your expectations but the coven has a right to their expectations of you.

Learn what all those expectations are and then, examine them. Decide if you can live with them. If you cannot - again, leave. Don't waste valuable time being wishy-washy.

You should have your standards, morals and ethics firmly in place BEFORE you go hunting around for a coven.

Find one that
suits you

And if you can't? Solitary practice is a viable and valuable
alternative.

There are far more solitary practitioners, by choice, than there are
covens and their members. It may well be the wave of our future.

Copyright Karen Rice-Leroux October 29th, 2003